Parenting Contents Archive

Babybjorn bouncer is the best thing ever

What the title says. Baby is 2 months and I have not been able to get anything done until husband gets home. Baby wants all the attention and to be held and to use my boobies as a pacifier… We ended up getting a babybjorn bouncer (secondhand) and I MANAGED TO TAKE A SHOWER, BLOW DRY & DO MY HAIR, AND MY SKINCARE ROUTINE….. All while he was in the bouncer playing with the toy thing in front of him (highly recommend that as well). This thing is magic 😭

How long did you wear your maternity clothes for after baby was born?

The pants are just so comfortable and I like not having to deal with buttons and zippers..can I just wear them forever?

FDA has decided to wait for more data before considering <5 children for the vaccine.

I was just so excited for this nightmare to be over. Finally they were going to review it next week. I know it's maybe not as effective but it's definitely safe and I would take 10% effectiveness over none. Definitely a tears day today.

Sanctimommies coming at me on FB for letting my kids play with old toys.

I realize that times change a especially when it comes to kids furniture and toys, safety standards lead the charge. But I’ve got to wonder…how much does it *really* matter? My mom has a bunch of toys from her own youth as well as me and my sister. So 60s - 90s toys & games. I think it’s cute that my kids like them and shit was better quality back then anyway, at least more durable. So I took pics and posted them in my mom group on FB and got flooded with comments about lead paint and chemicals. I’m all for being safe rather than sorry but I’m just saying, my mom is over 60 and hasn’t grown a third arm yet. I’m in my 30s and I’m 100% sure I’m not sick from playing with plastic. People really have got to unclench sometimes. I’d rather them have this than the billion toys today that have to have batteries shoved up the ass.

Spit up…in my mouth

My beautiful baby had just woken up from a nap so I did what any sane parent would do and started to kiss her all over semi-aggressively. As I was kissing those delicious chunky cheeks, my baby spit up. And it went in my mouth. IN MY MOUTH. To make matters even worse, she had my hair in her hands so I couldn’t even react right away. I am vowing to hold this over her head her entire life.

Vaccine rollout is delayed. Again.

This is fine. Everything is fine. I’ll just shelter my 2 year old for the rest of forever because even colds set her back for weeks. I’m fine. . . . I’m not fine.

Random advise for "monsters under the bed" issues. Put the bed on the floor.

My 6 year old kept coming to sleep in my bed because of being afraid of scary things under the bed. I prefer my box springs and mattress to be solid on the floor, in retrospect I guess I don't know why I bothered elevating his bed. I don't mind sharing a bed with the little guy, but he doesn't have an issue with his bed on the floor like mine. Without that dark unknown space beneath him, he is totally good :)

Do other mammals have trouble getting milk to their offspring?

Or do only humans struggle with latch, supply, etc.

Alternative titles to everyday things

So we’ve had our share of child-generated creative titles to everyday things, eg “hookers” instead of “bungee cords”, but this newest one may be my favorite. I usually get ready for work before the kids are up. Today, my daughter (4) woke up early and came into the room as I was changing. She looked at me and pointed to my back and said, “mommy I love that suitcase for your privates!” My bra. That’s my bra. But I do admire the creativity.

We're just ancient, I guess

My 7 yo went to the movies on a school field trip yesterday. "We watched Dennis the Menace!" "Oh, the one from the 90s?" "No. It was in color." Excuse me while I go polish my phonograph.

Pain I was never warned about!

I’m 11 days pp, she was originally due today. Easy pregnancy, perfect delivery, vaginal. I ripped horizontally, only slightly on the inside of my lip. Sorry if tmi! They said no need for stitches .. however, I’m in EXCRUCIATING pain.. and it’s not coming from the lip, it is coming from my clit?!?!?! Is this normal ???? It feels like it is popping out .. I can’t sit up straight, I can’t even stand at times.. in the shower when I’m trying to clean myself just touching near it, hurts. They told me to put ice…. It helps, only slightly & temporarily. But I need to know if I’m the only one, and why ! & is there anything I can do.

Did anyone else's butt disappear?

I used to have a cute little round butt and one of the only things I liked about my body. It's gone after giving birth. I know it's because my hips are probably wider and I'm not walking as much as I used to. But wtf, mom bod...

Coronavirus vaccine for young children further delayed as FDA says it will wait for data on three doses

I can't have anything nice

My MIL gave me a cutting of her Christmas cactus last summer. I babied it, payed more attention to it than any of my other plants, gave it the best spot for light. It grew 2 new segments and then a few weeks ago I see it starting to flower. This itty-bitty cutting pushed out 4 blooms. I felt like a green goddess. Today I walked past it and looked down to see if this monstrous flower had bloomed yet and what did I see? Go ahead, guess, I'll wait.. *All of the flowers had been plucked off* I immediately gasped and looked over at my 3 year old. I could see it on his face. I asked him if he knew what happened and he very timidly said, "I did it...I'm sorry mom." I mean, he immediately melted my heart and I made sure he knew I wasn't mad at him...but inside..what the actual fuck?! I don't have home decor, I don't wear nice clothes, can I please just reap the fruits of my labor on this dumb plant? 😭😭😭

What was your kiddo's first injury?

So this week our toddler (22mo) fell on some concrete and chipped his two front teeth. He lost a third of one and says bus as "buth" now. His dad and I are traumatized (kiddo is doing fine -starting to drink out of his sippy cup again after 2 days of crying "teeth hurt" every time he tried. Didn't hit a nerve and the dentist says the best approach is to keep an eye on it, so he's rocking a hockey player smile). But I've found that every parent I've told about it has a solid "first injury" story in the bank to share and it's oddly comforting. I know we're not bad parents, accidents happen, and our little guy is going to be okay. But sometimes I need to remind my heart of all of those things. So, if you have a story please share!