Parenting Contents Archive

Parenting win

My daughter texted me the other day from her dad’s house (we’re long separated) and said “mom, I need support. Are you around?” and I burst into tears. My daughter is learning 1. How to notice when she needs support 2. How to ask for it 3. That I am one of her supports. And I feel like I’ve accomplished something.

Instead of focusing on the expectation that kids will be at grade level, the tone for teachers and parents should be, “this may be something you missed, we’re just going to have to work on it together.” @nytimes @PerriKlass https://t.co/641v2Yjr94

"My research shows the benefits [when fathers are caregivers] also include having children who value emotional intelligence, gender equality and healthy competition." @ConversationUS #fathers #emotionalintelligence https://t.co/LEJ5JTdcc4 https://t.co/gMQvKXVWFH

Do I tell another new parent my worry about their child?

I feel like expressing worry to another new parent is a tricky subject. My friend just had her baby. Last night I saw him he was jaundice (yellow eyes) I know this is common in breastfed babies. My LO was also a little jaundice. But today well hanging out in a group she expressed how he slept 7hours last night (whole stretch not waking to feed) I feel like not eating, and sleeping that long for a 2week old with jaundice, is something to talk to a doctor about. When my daughter was jaundice, I was very worried. My doctor told me to feed constantly, and to watch for her being hard to wake up... My friend thinks she's won the baby lottery. Do I say something? What would I even say?

Did you guys lose friends once you became parents?

I understand everyone has stuff going on in their life. It’s just kind of interesting how when you become a parent, it’s like no one checks in on you? The only time would be is to see when they can see the baby, if even that. Maybe their reasoning is “oh the new parents don’t want to be bothered, so maybe I’ll wait for them to reach out to me”. Is that what any of you thought before you came parents?

And he’s sick

I’m day 6 post emergency c-section. I’m in pain, hormonal, and barely sleep 2 hours straight at night. We had a little health scare for our little one (all is good, waiting on one more test, but it’s more a formality), which is not helping my post partum overall well-being. But my husband has a sore throat, so you know, his pain trumps mine? (At least it’s not COVID). I hate it when he’s ill, the world has to stop turning and god forbid I need his assistance with something… but when I’m ill?? No, it’s “not that bad”, “you don’t look sick”, or “you’re pregnant, your immune system is taking care of it”. He’s been the best so far, but today’s pity party about his throat is just about to break me.

I'm the only mom from all the people I personally know in my life that gained a ton of baby weight and couldn't lose any it even years after.

From family, friends, school moms, neighbors, people from college, coworkers...no one gained nearly as much as I did and everyone lost if not all, most of the weight. I feel so...different ? Bizarre? Being the only one. And from fit to the largest person I and probably they know. That's all. Are there other of us out there to commiserate and have a little pity party with me?

⚠️Most children and teens have a positive experience online, but if something goes wrong for them what can #parents do, and what supports are available to you and your child? Áine Lynch, of the @NPCPrimary, provides advice about how to deal with the situation. ⤵️ #OnlineSafety https://t.co/fAwnCwPGmy

Birth Control

After the birth of my last baby, almost exactly one year ago, I went on hormonal BC until we could get my husband snipped. I’ve always had an occasional migraine here or there, but I started getting them several times a month. 7 weeks ago, I decided that I couldn’t take it anymore. They would leave me bed bound. Anxious. Tense. Nauseous. One time I threw up for an hour straight. I told my husband I was going off my birth control, that I’d look into an IUD or something. He said, no that’s silly he’d just get fixed and to go off it to see if it helped. (He has a consult appt coming up. He’s wonderful.) I haven’t had a single migraine since I stopped taking birth control. I don’t know what my point is of this. That BC is often put on women. That it can cause so many things without even realizing it. So take care of yourselves ladies. And when you have a concern, take yourself seriously!

Am I nasty for this?

I have my baby in a baby wrap while I poop and I can’t help but to feel kinda gross for doing this but it gives me such a peace of mind that he won’t suddenly choke on his own spit up. Not to mention I won’t feel have to deal with baby cries mid-poop and have to cut it off prematurely.

Data shows the transition to college is a peak time of onset of eating disorders. And they can affect anyone — any gender, any body size, any race. @OonaHanson #collegelife #eatingdisorders https://t.co/KITpzy8DEA

Newborn stage - at what week did life feel more like living than survival?

Currently 7 weeks in and honestly feeling like we’re just in survival mode. Our LO seems like a relatively easy baby, but requires so much effort to get to sleep that I am too exhausted to do anything besides sit in silence once she’s down. That is, if she manages to sleep somewhere besides on us, which is feeling more rare these days (currently wearing her in a carrier and pacing the house to make sure she gets a nap). Seeing as there are so many parents that have multiple kids, I feel like that must mean this stage doesn’t last for very long because they are willing to do it again. Is this just first time parent overwhelm? Do you remember a time when life started feeling less like survival mode?

My relationship with my cats has changed since having a baby.

And it's very confusing and sad. I used to give them so much attention but I can't as much now, and my husband is allergic to them so he can't do it either. We've had them for over 10 years and they're already not allowed in the bedroom because my husband needs a cat free zone to sleep. They don't understand what's happening and it's breaking my heart. I also feel some resentment towards them, which is so foreign to me. The anxiety it's causing is really getting to me. If this has happened to you, how do you deal with it? Do things change as baby gets older? Any tips? I'm feeling so sad about it.

My son’s speech is regressing and I don’t know what to do. I feel like I’m failing him.

If anyone has suggestions for another subreddit for this, please let me know. My son was diagnosed with autism last year and he had early intervention(virtually) and he has been getting speech/occupational therapy for the last year twice a week. He was able to label colors and animals, recite nursery rhymes, and he was starting to request things. Now he refuses to ask for anything and will have a full blown tantrum. He mumbles 75% of the things he says and won’t make eye contact anymore or echo things when I try to play with him. He’s starting preschool and I feel like I’ve failed him. We’ve increased therapies to three times a week for both on top of preschool. I’m desperate to help him. I’m so sad for him, it almost looks like it’s painful for him to ask for something when prompted. I feel like a failure, guilty of the childhood he’s being robbed of. I don’t know how to help him. I feel like I’m not doing enough and I’m exhausted and angry and so sad for him.

My husband had a stroke

My husband had a stroke. He turned 36 while in the hospital. I'm feeling lost and scared. He needs in-patient rehab but doesn't want to be left alone in a facility. It is more than I can handle on my own. I'm having to negotiate whether I should prioritize his mental health with not being alone for the treatment time vs. his actual physical healing. We had OT today who recommended in-patient after he has lost some of the skills he gained while in the hospital. He went from being able to walk in a walker to needing a wheelchair within a span of 12 hours. We have a 5 year old that started kindergarten full-time this week. I'm worried about how long his recovery will take, I'm worried about him losing his job, I'm worried about how long he will need to be on disability, I'm so fucking worried about all of it. And I have to stay positive because of how negative he is being about his health.