Parenting Contents Archive

“Your child isn’t responsible for your feelings”

Something I have seen people say on this sub is that you shouldn’t tell your child they hurt your feelings. Or along the lines of “you made me sad when you did x”. I’m a first time mom to a seventh month old so I have a little ways to go before he’s even saying anything hurtful but I’m sure there will come a time when he does. I’m looking to understand this concept more because while theoretically no one can control your feelings but you, you should still be aware that sometimes the way you say things can hurt other people? I’m wondering specifically why people are saying you shouldn’t say this to your child though. I have told my mom or sister when that have said something hurtful so why specifically should we not put that on our own children. Please let me know if I’m understanding this concept incorrectly! TIA

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My brother and sister-in-law used the baby name we were planning on…

My wife and I are having a baby in the next few months and we’ve picked out names if it’s boy or if it’s a girl. My brother and sister-in-law have just given birth to a girl. A couple of months ago, we confided in them the baby names we had in mind. Luckily our names weren’t on their list. They said of our first choice name for a girl ‘we won’t use that because you guys are going to use it’. However when the baby was born, they did use our first choice name. I’m obviously happy for them and relieved baby is healthy etc. But am I wrong for feeling aggrieved they took our name? You can’t have ownership of a name and we don’t even know if we’re having a girl so it might be null and void. But it just feels inconsiderate? I think I’m being petty. Does it even matter if we still use the same name? Any advice appreciated. Thank you

My sister did the first thing that’s helped me feel better since losing my son.

February 17 is National Act of Kindness day. I’m not one of those people who pays attention to those silly “days” but my sister is. She set up a FB group in memory of Alex for people to do kind acts in his memory that day. My son was such a kind and generous person. I think the world would be better if everyone had someone close to them like Alex. It would be a perfect world if everyone was like him. It’s small and I don’t know if people will participate. I’m making a blanket for a stranger. Doing things for others has always brought me joy. And I’m not going to let the people who stole my baby from me also steal my kindness.

Half Assing Husband

So apparently I screwd up. My husband called me in the middle of changing a dirty diaper and helping homeschool my daughter. He wanted me to immediately look up some air b&b since I mentioned wanting to go on a vacation for Valentines Day. Both air b&bs he wanted me to look up were beach/lake side in February. I asked him what we were going to do in these obviously outdoorsy locations in winter, and who was going to watch the kids. He said "I don't know" and got real quiet the rest of the conversation. Apparently I was just suppose to be super excited that he was at least looking up places, forget all the semantics that he will no doubt want me to figure out. I am just so tired of him half-assing everything. Sorry guys reddit is just a good place to vent.

Am I still a parent?

Bit of a situation here. I’ve asked some friends and their advice/answer seems split so I’m here to ask Reddit. The situation: relationship has ended after close to 7 years. When I got with my now ex she had two kids from a previous relationship. A girl (1) and a boy (2). I’ve spent the last 7 years raising these kids with her. I’ve made everything from school decisions, medical decisions, etc. every single duty a biological parent would. They see their bio dad once a week if that. My question is, as I consider myself their dad, should I still be a parent or does this relationship ending also end my time as a parent? Some people are saying I should move on from the kids, others say I’m their dad regardless of paternity. My heads been in a real mess because of the breakup and thinking I’m gonna lose these kids. One plus is their mom considers me more their father than the bio dad. Does any of this make sense? I’m rambling now. Sorry, Reddit.

What did you do with your child’s lost baby teeth?

Ok, first off, it seems wholly unreasonable that my child could possibly be old enough to be losing teeth. That seems like such a “big kid” thing, but she’s been wiggling for the past few weeks, and ran into the kitchen earlier shouting, “Momma! It came out! It came out!” She’s over the moon. Anyway, she’s pumped for the Tooth Fairy to visit tonight, and I don’t really have a game plan. Did you all keep your kids’ teeth? Toss them in the trash? Keep the first, toss the rest? Also, still deciding how generous a tooth fairy she’s going to have haha. When I was a kid, it was $1 per tooth. I know she had a classmate who lost her first tooth a week or so ago, and she got a $20... Our tooth fairy may not be that wealthy haha. We already have another tooth that’s just about as wiggly, and that could add up quickly! Or do first teeth get a bigger pay out than subsequent teeth?

Anyone else get this feeling? 👇 #parenting #wednesdaythought https://t.co/MKlP8RrkM8

TikTok feed is full of SIDS/infant loss/stillbirth videos

Hey, is anyone else’s TikTok feed regularly showing SIDS/infant loss/stillbirth content? Mine is, to the extent where Im considering deleting the whole app as it makes me so anxious and upset. I heard another new mum saying the same thing so I was just wondering if this is a wider problem? Im aware social media will show you the type of content that you usually click or watch but I havent watched these type of videos more than others and neither has the other mum

"Mean Mummy" Passive Agressive Baby Talk

Just had to share this funny exchange. I was leaving the doctors today and standing near the door in the sort of foyer area with my baby while my husband went to get the car. It's 4 degrees (40 F I believe) so not warm but not freezing. My daughter was in her sweater suit, but not in her bulky snow suit because she was about to go into a car seat. An older lady (maybe 60's) stopped to comment how cute she was and then said to my baby "You need to tell mummy she has to put a jacket on you! Mean mummy taking you into the freezing cold like that!" So I kind of laughed and said, to my baby, "Oh tell the nice lady not to worry! Daddy is bringing a warm car and mummy knows how dangerous your big snowsuit is in the car seat so she didn't bring it! I know you'd rather be chilly for a second than hurt forever in an accident!" She looked at me like I had three heads and walked away.

Do you start getting rid of their clothes when their pants hike up when they sit? When she stands her pants hit her ankle but when she sits, it looks like she’s wearing shorts lol. She’s 3 months old wearing 0-3 months.

Emotional honesty is “one of the biggest gifts that I’m giving my boys,” says @browndamon https://t.co/7vWWyIY4ol https://t.co/KAI2J2dYAU

Sometimes when we're stuck in a parenting problem without a fix, the best thing to do is step away from it. Take in something that is a feel good. (❁´◡`❁)

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Baby sleeping with hands under head??

My 4mo old baby recently started sleeping with her little hands under her head. I know she's about to drift off when she gets into that 'just chillin' pose. At first I would pull them out because I thought they would go numb because the head is huge and heavy but she doesn't seem to mind. She LOVES it. Today after her nap there were red imprints on the back of her head where the hands were throughout her whole nap. Is this normal ??? I mean she looks very cool but I've not seen anything like it before 😅 anyone elses babies do this?